Making contact

It has been a few weeks now that our little in utero girl has been poking away and letting us know she really is there and that mommy is not just gaining weight for kicks. She loves Alan's voice. When he talks to her in the belly she always moves and gives us her best pokes. This is the extent to which we have been making contact with eachother, in spite of the fact that she and I are a part of eachother right now.

At the Dinner Dance this winter, a older lady in her eighties, a psychiatrist, was telling me that it is terribly important to get into a deep mediative state and to make contact with the baby. by being able to make contact with her and connect to her I will be able to keep her calm during birth and get us both through it. What if I cannot make contact with her enough to make her feel safe and calm? Then it will be like we will both be getting washed away in this very frightening moment. It is scary to anticipate. Scary to not know how it will be for me and her. Alan will be there waiting to hold both of us - that thought brings great comfort. It will be one of the most amazing things that we will do together. It will be a moment hard to top on the list of life experiences.

Until that time, I will be doing my best to sing to her, talk to her and touch her while she shares a space with me.

Hi Daddy

This morning, Alan leaned over to say good morning to the baby - he spoke into the belly and would you believe it she poked her hardest and daddy felt her sawing "Hi" right back. ;)

Progress Update - 21 weeks and 3 days

So far, I am still feeling great. Other than a bit of low blood pressure, I am in tip top shape and feel wonderful. I ma horrified however by the Scale which has tipped froward to 180 lbs! That is up 17 lbs since I got pregnant. Is this normal? Well according to my chart which is based on a 3 lb weight gain in the first three months and a pound every week in teh second trimester...I am over by 3 lbs. Arrgh. But the midwife said that it was an average and that I can expect spurts rather thana consistent rise in weight...well I have to trust her on that...but I am not entirley sure that I believe her :)

My waist has exploded out to 42 inches! Geez - will I ever get back to a 32/33? I have big ambitious plans to get to a 31! We'll see...Ia m getting ahead of myself...

I am starting to feel her move around more and more...it is very neat...it's like she is saying "Hi mom - it's me!".

A first time for everything

There is only a first time once - Here are some special first time moments that I have expereince so far:

Getting pregnant on the first try - oops...that was quick!

The first time you experience your hips shifting and your wiggle turns into a waddle - reality starts to set in that you may never walk the same again. Will you forget to get your wiggle back?

The first time you see your baby swim around on the ultrasound monitor and fall in love with them - you are touched in a way that you cannot explain.

The first time you can really feel your baby move...and it's not gas - you suddenly realise how intimate the experience of carrying a child can be. I want to say hi there little person...Are you OK in there?

The first time you catch a glipse of your expanding midsection from the side...at first it weird, but you can't help but admire the capacity of your body to accomodate these changes and admire how beautiful it looks.

The first time you hear your heartbeat and theirs - you realise there are two heart beats - when you really realise that there is another life there to take care of.

The first time you realise that you are really going to be somebody's mom and you realise that this small beautiful life will bring so much joy and without knowing it, will also be the scariest undertaking of your life.

As my belly continues to grow and get larger...I am at 42inches right now and I can't beleive there could actually be more to go... I am sure that there will be more firsts - but the one I look forward to the most is the first time that we look into our daughter's eyes.

It's A Girl!

The moment of truth arrived and the ultrasound technician confirmed that in fact that baby is a little girl. She is 6 wee ounces (obviously doesn't explain the weight gain;-) and she has a wee heart pumping away....her little kidneys, her teeny tummy, little eyes, nose and ears... she appears to be very healthy...and quite content in her little cocoon.